patience

I am really not good at waiting. I really need to learn it, patience that is. When things don't go the way I want them to go, I get angry and bitter. Even when I know that getting angry and bitter doesn't help nor change the situation.
I'll enlighten you, you who constitute my minuscule following of readers as to my status: i am now, just ...like any other guy, nothing special, just a deflated husk of how i used to feel, of how she used to make me feel.

I brought it up, even though I did not want to ask you,
i knew it would lead to something i did not want,
even when i that knew what would come would be for the best.
Now...now i am stuck; stuck with this regret.

What would it have been like if i had kept my big mouth shut.
I second guess my thoughts every moment i am awake,
I cant fall asleep so i second guess myself all day and night long.
My judgement is shot, and i have no self-confidence.

I want to turn back time and take back words,
but in the end it can't be done.
What has been said, and the decisions that have been made,
has been said and have been made.

so accept and wait
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Patience comes hand in hand with humbleness, to accept what is given to me by God. To let Him work his way within me while I am waiting. I don't know if I can let go and accept what has happened yet, but I want to, and I know I should. Its a start at least....its a start.